STAFF BLOG

For those of you that don’t know, I experienced a major car wreck about a month ago. I tried to avoid the semi on my right, tried to avoid the wall on my left, and then lost control. I crashed into the semi, bounced off of him, spun at least once and then crashed into the concrete wall on my left. It was a terrible experience but I walked away with minor cuts and bruises. As I sat there in shock wondering how on earth I ended up where I was, I realized something. All the things I had been so worried about, melted away. I was just happy to be alive in that moment. Well, maybe not that exact moment, but my perspective on my life’s joys and concerns shifted drastically. I realized that I wanted to live in the present and not worry about the future that I have no control over. Jesus talks in Matthew 6 about worry. He asks the disciples, “Does God not care more for you than the birds or the flowers of the fields? Won’t he take care of you?” And then he tells them, “Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own.” Matthew‬ ‭6:34‬ It was made strikingly clear that God takes care of me and that each day is meant to be lived not worried through. Jesus overcame sin and death so that we could live a life full of abundant love. My second perspective shift came after struggling through the what if’s, which was almost scarier than the wreck. What if I had been in a different car?

One thing in my life that tends to goes to all extremes is spending daily time reading the Bible. I will be super consistent for a season, share with others where I am reading and discuss it, journal what I’m understanding, use a Bible study resource, etc. and in other seasons – almost none of it. In those seasons where I struggle to find a “groove” for a time or a desire to read, a process I have learned along the way continues to help me, and I pray it may help you, as well! As you sit before a passage of Scripture, read straight through it once. When you have chosen your starting and stopping points, think about these questions as you read through it again: What do I notice the most about this section? Is there anything repetitive, striking, or unusual happening here? What about this passage comforts me or makes me uncomfortable in what I am reading? Why? What don’t I understand about this passage? Who or what can I reference to help me understand better? How would my life be different if I applied what I just read, and what would a prayer including the truth of this passage look like for me? May the Lord continue to strengthen and encourage you, and may you be refreshed in your time in His Word in this season. Amen!

I have to confess I find knowing God and being fully known by Him at times hard to grasp. I wonder what Enoch’s life looked like on a daily basis (Gen. 5:23-4, Heb 11:5). I struggle to understand true intimacy with people not to mention intimacy with the perfect King of the universe. Yet, we have a Father who fully knows us and cultivates intimacy with his creation. Are not two sparrows sold for a penny?And not one of them will fall to the ground apart from your Father. But even the hairs of your head are all numbered. Fear not, therefore; you are of more value than many sparrows. (Matt 10:29-31) We have a Savior who understands our experiences. For we do not have a high priest who is unable to sympathize with our weaknesses, but one who in every respect has been tempted as we are, yet without sin. Let us then with confidence draw near to the throne of grace, that we may receive mercy and find grace to help in time of need. (Heb 4:15-16) About six weeks ago now, I was finished working for the day. My two year-old daughter invited me to sit on the couch with her. She asked me to take off my glasses and remove my pony tail holder. She took off my shoes and went and got a blanket to put over me and snuggled under it beside me as we faced each other. She looked into my eyes while touching my hair and face and kissed me as only a two-year old can. We were so close we shared the same breath. She breathed in and sighed. Her face was the only thing I was focused on.

My recent trip to the emergency room really put me in my place. A few weeks ago, I awoke in the middle of the night with abdominal pain which I immediately self-diagnosed as a stomach bug. I was sure it was nothing serious and went back to bed certain that with some rest I’d be back on my feet in no time. A few hours later, as the symptoms got worse, I shifted my thinking a bit: food poisoning. I was sure that was the culprit. I was beginning to question my cooking, but I was certain of my medical diagnosis. This was nothing that some self-care and fluids couldn’t cure, and the comfort of my own home was the best place for me. As the 24-hour mark approached during the wee hours of the next morning, however, my symptoms were not improving, and my husband began to encourage me to seek a second opinion. I was in quite a bit of pain at that point but while part of me longed to find some relief, I still resisted the idea of going to the hospital. The hospital was for sick people. REALLY sick people. Surely the hospital would take one look at me and then send me home to make space available for someone who really needed help. Eventually my husband convinced me and we made our way to the ER, but even as I sat awaiting test results, I could not help but feel that I did not belong there. All around me patients were being brought in on gurneys by paramedics. Machines were beeping ominously, and from the next room I could hear the hospital staff calming

I will sing of the Lord’s great love forever;    with my mouth I will make your faithfulness known    through all generations.    I will declare that your love stands firm forever,    that you have established your faithfulness in heaven itself. Psalm 89:1-2 Do you like to sing? I don’t. I’m not a good singer. My voice still cracks and I’m tone-deaf. I’d rather listen to others sing even if it’s a song I don’t like. I don’t sing when I’m alone—that’s how bad it is. Psalm 89 is credited to Ethan the Ezrahite, in the time of Solomon; 1 Kings 4 places him in the context of history for us. What’s interesting to me about this song of praise is that it is written when praise was in short supply—after the Jews had been deported to Babylon and all was lost. I would think a song of lament would be more appropriate than a song of praise. Nonetheless, that’s what we have here. Ethan expressing a belief that despite what he sees, God is good and faithful and must be trusted to fulfill His promises to His people. The specific promise he sings of is found in 2 Samuel 7:12, during the reign of King David, “I will raise up your offspring to succeed you, your own flesh and blood, and I will establish his kingdom.” That’s quite a promise, isn’t it?  It’s more than a promise of provision in times of scarcity, or to make a bad situation good, it’s a promise of a complete reversal of the situation—from captives to conquerors. Let me ask you: how’s your singing voice? The Psalm challenges us, begs us,

Let all the house of Israel therefore know for certain that God has made him both Lord and Christ, this Jesus whom you crucified.” Acts 2:36 Scripture shows us the fullness of love that God has demonstrated for us, all of humanity. This love is incomprehensible to us even as we attempt (and fail) to reciprocate this immense love. The majority of the psalms that David wrote relate to us the distinct experiences he had with God and his love, and David showed his gratitude in such ways that they still serve as an inspiration to us today to do the same. David recognized that although he was the king of Israel, there was still a King of Kings who is above all things in authority. As such, his heart never ceased to sing to God and praise him, not only for his greatness, but also his love. Imagine that we are climbing a tall and rocky mountain. There is danger in each step and tension is running high. Our hearts are beating at 100% as we are excited and anxious to arrive at the top. Even in that excitement, there are setbacks along the way as well as the temptation to return to the bottom and give up. At a certain point, we stop seeing our next move in front of us and begin to wonder if we will be able to find the route to the top. We are afraid. Then, in that moment, the Holy Spirit reminds us that Jesus sent him to be there for us to guide us, cheer us on, and strengthen us in our laboring until we reach the rest at the end of the journey.